Quite busy yesterday doing bits of this and that. Also did some meditation which prompted me to write on the forum about it, as am wondering how many other people practice and what sorts of things they do. So far no responses, so maybe no-one else does?

By 9pm I was really tired and feeling a bit unwell, which is unusual for a sunday night. Had a bath - a rare treat for skin reasons - then just had to go straight to bed, wet hair and all. Listened to radio til I nodded off, then had a fitful night, feeling horrid - much more so than usual. Apparently I had been moaning in the night again (I have no awareness of this), and today I'm feeling tired, rough and a bit sick. Could be a day of TV intersperced with naps.

I am continually amazed at how much how I feel physically affects my emotional state. When I feel relatively OK I can relax, find optimism and just a little motivation, but when I'm not so well I can feel a bit worried and sad. Then I go up again, and find some sort of faith in how things are and will be. Strange. But now at least I recognise it, so when I'm feeling unwell and down, I know that I will come back up, and that I just have to ride it out and learn what I can from the experience.

On a more positive note, Hurray! I have bought some new jeans and they fit! What a difference it makes to wear things that don't make your legs look like twigs in trousers! Actually, you know the kids that wear their jeans round their thighs, showing their underwear? Well I've been a bit like that, tho of course not intentionally - my trousers have just been making their way further and further down my body! So, having been devoid of my bottom in my usual clothes, it has now reappeared, thanks to the wonders of clothes that fit! What a concept! Even if I grow out of them as soon as I finish treatment, it will have been worth it just to feel more like I'm wearing my own clothes rather than my big sisters!

Hair cut tomorrow as my hair is looking a bit worse for wear. So new hair do and well fitting jeans - well I'll be ready to face the world! OK maybe the village...